I cannot express how happy I am that autumn has finally graced our sunny Southern Californian region. A blanket of dark, grey clouds stretched over our blue skies this past Thanksgiving weekend and unleashed a torrent of gusty rain. The temperature dropped significantly, requiring all to dig out their thick, warm coats and blast the heater inside their homes. I always thought the city looks so beautiful after a bout of rain. The smog and pollution have been temporarily washed away. The snow-tipped mountains now loom tall and dark behind the city - vivid and striking, no longer forgotten. The air is cold and crisp. The streets glitter, remnants of rain still lingering. And the plants and trees produce the most lush, vibrant greens.

I'm happy to say that I'm finally a proud owner of mustard colored tights. As someone with so-called thunder thighs, I've always been told to stay away from bright colors because they draw more attention to unwanted areas. "You must wear dark bottoms and light tops," they said. For many years, I'd only wear black tights because black is more "slimming". Well, that kind of mentality was bothering me for a while. I'm already a very shy person who ironically likes things that tend to attract people's attention. But finally I said screw it. I'm going for it. And I'm happy I did. It was such a wonderfully contrasting color to all the black I was wearing.

  I attended a wedding this past weekend and was not really up for fancy attire as I'd been sick nearly the entire week. Regretfully, I couldn't make it to the ceremony. Since the reception wouldn't take place until evening, I dropped by the park to kill some time. It was a beautiful day with clouds slowly blanketing the sky, bringing temperatures down to a pleasant temperature. The wind blew soft and gentle, the rustling of leaves a comforting sound. While families were out having lively picnics and peering curiously over at me, I was quite happy spending time alone by myself at the park. Most people fear being alone in public places, but I've come to enjoy it immensely lately. It's a very liberating and peaceful feeling. Aside from the two young men who playfully shouted "Say cheese!" at me, the photoshoot went well. I'm starting to get over my anxiety of onlookers judging me or stealing my equipment.  My battery was fully charged. And no one derailed me from my purpose for 20 minutes with their lifestory this time either. 

Indeed, a silly fool I was. I was excited to do this shoot because it was finally cool enough to wear this mustard beret I knitted last week. I had left my home and scampered off into the park without bothering to check one very important thing: my camera battery. I happily set up the tripod, managed some test shots, and watched a couple of squirrels play in the trees. All was ready. I ran on over to my spot and posed a few times while the self-timer went off. Ran back to check the photos. "Not bad," I said to myself as I deleted all the fails. As soon as I returned from a second round of photos, I saw that awful blinking warning on the display that tells you the battery is low and can't take anymore pictures! So, these were all that I managed to take. It really was unfortunate because I was quite eager to practice different angles as I don't always want to depend on someone else to do it. So, let this be a lesson for us all. Don't forget to charge your battery and always check before you leave!

 Many things didn't work out this weekend. I was to wear this outfit to a nice dinner in honor of our 8 years together, but I didn't expect to get so violently ill. I had woken up early and ran off into the park to snap these photos all by myself. John was still asleep. I wanted to surprise him by getting all dolled up in this sweet dress and lovely coat, which I completely abandoned right after this shoot because the weather was exceedingly hot. So, dinner didn't happen. We were also supposed to get brunch on Sunday with our friends but had to cancel that too. Sad days.

 It's been a rather stressful week to put it lightly. Things didn't work out the way I had hoped. I moped around for some time but eventually roused myself from the lethargic lull following a certain momentous event. I needed to get mind off things and this post was not going write itself. As famously quoted in Moulin Rouge (one of my favorite movies of all time), 

 With the lack of fall foliage in my life - aside from artificial decorations exploding from all the stores I visit - I find myself impulsively drawn to autumnal golds and russet reds. Even pumpkin oranges like this knit top I purchased from Uniqlo. You cannot imagine the happiness that alighted me as soon as I found out that Uniqlo stores were opening in select areas around me. When I was living in Japan for a short time many years ago, I'd visit the store quite often. I was unprepared for the cold weather in Japan as I was used to winters in California. I was completely enamored by the "Heat-Tec" technology in some of their basic clothing. I thought it was the coolest thing ever. It's supposed to keep heat in so you stay warmer. And it really does. I still have one of the striped, long sleeved shirts I bought then, which I save for when it gets really cold. Makes me kinda sweaty otherwise.

 Remember what I said about shrinking your clothes in the washer/dryer and how you run the risk of too much shrinkage? Well, this burnt orange dress was a victim of such an atrocity. I purposely meant to shrink it down a size but I wasn't expecting it to shrink that much. It's shorter than I'd prefer but I still like it a lot. I'm just glad I'm short because no one wants to see butt cheeks! I think it's a good time to try my hand at one of those "how-to's" to reverse the damage. Should be easy, right? I would hate to ruin it. It's got such an awesome 70s inspired silhouette that's just so groovy (hehe). I love the vibrant, foxy burnt orange hue. I can already see myself wearing it with boots some time in the future.

 And so we come to this at last. The Velvet Panoply. I felt this name perfectly reflected the reason why I dress the way I do. I grew up with friends who weren't as interested in clothes/appearance as I was and often felt overdressed when we went anywhere. I was very self conscious of this but did not let it bother me because I felt comfortable and safe in the dress or blouse/skirt I wore. I felt like me. I love to wear soft, pretty, feminine things. This is who I am. I don't wear these things to garner attention. Attention is the last thing I want but because I differ from others around me, I obviously do stick out like a sore thumb at times. But I am happiest and brightest when I dress for myself. Just like a gleaming armor is part of a knight, my clothes are an extention of me. I feel good and condident.  I feel powerful in my own way. Do I need them to feel like this? No. And I honestly think as a matter of self expression, it is key to do what makes one happy. If I am seen as vain or conceited because I'd rather slip on my pretty clothes, then so be it. It surely will not be the death of me.